The Silence...

The silence these days
Doesn’t seem to go away...
Suddenly there’s too much talking
In our silent conversations then ever before...

You think you knew me
Did you know I dreamt of you every night…?
I dreamt for the kisses...
For the hugs...for the love…
But I was just a friend
Cause you didn’t know me

I was wrong I thought I was enough
But you needed everyone to like you...
I thought I belonged to you
And you belonged to me…But
Everything just kept on changing
With you all the time…
Every time you wanted more…

The silence these days...
Just doesn’t go..
It grows...

I know I let my chance go by…
The chance of knowing you might
Love me too,

The silence these days…
Just doesn’t go..
It grows...

This day dies tonight…

Feels like we were here...
Just yesterday..
Together as always..
In love as always..
But Today..
Being alone..
Without you isn’t making me lonely anymore…

Just yesterday..
I thought of you..
Thought of us being together,
Just the way you had promise..
Just the way you made me promise…

Was loving you so bad..
Was it the biggest mistake of my life…
I still don’t get it..
Nor do i regret it..
Maybe because I still need that closure..
To regret what we had…
To feel that void..

Today i realised..
We don’t have a tomorrow..
But I know I have a future…
A beautiful one without you..
I can live with these memories..
Even when you don’t oblige me with a reason..
I know what I had and shared..
I know i loved you with all my heart..
Now i know all my love was just not enough..

Feels like we were here...
Just yesterday..
But today..
I realised..
I waited too long for you..
Too long for a good bye..

This day dies tonight…
And with it you die too…

Seeking Solace...

I have been thinking
To write about us
But every time I start
I feel confused
I get lost and
Eventually I stop may be
Because we didn’t have an end
So my story doesn’t deserve too…

The funny thing is…
I just can’t even find
A proper make belief one
Its surprising how…
Sometimes when you know
Something for sure
It never accumulates the way
You expected it too

The truth is…
I can’t take it anymore
I always thought this was true
Had thought we will make it through

So all I write now is
That I have…
Been lost every since you left
Been angry ever since you went…
Been hurt ever since you lied
Been lonely ever since I wanted to be…

But now I seek solace
After knowing what it feels
To loose something
You can’t replace…

Second Chances

November Rains
Surprise me by…
And makes me wonder
Could these black clouds
Never go by…

Days come days go
This november rain just won’t...
As long as I had you
I knew I would never be alone…
As soon as you weren’t here by me
Everything I knew just fell apart…
I cannot take any other day without you…

Now it seems that
Even goodbye is a second chance…
I want mine…
Sometimes, the thing you want
The most never comes by...
And sometimes when we get second chances
We realize how we never made it past the first…
Maybe that is why it is said all you can do
Sometimes is wait..wait and wait..

Don’t be afraid of what you are…
Just look around you
Everyone is someone
Everyone is just someone…
Even second chances just come once in life…
We can have ours..

November Rains
Surprise me by…
Sometimes, the thing you want
The most never comes by...

A HURT INDIAN !!!

A year has passed when the most notoriously planned massacre was executed on my city on our city and a year has passed since then and we have done absolutely nothing about it. Our judicial system hasn’t even gotten the trail over we couldn’t even hang the person we had caught let alone dream on to get the guys at the top. Does that even matter why can’t we finish what we have; to say we have not gotten enough evidence is plain stupid. After seeing Qasab’s statements in the documentary “Dispatches – Terror In Mumbai” which was produced by Channel 4 a good 4 months ago; I mean what more we want a British channel comes and shows the interrogation between the dreaded terrorist and our cops 10 mins after he is captured I mean wow had this happened in any other country I don’t think they would be sitting and doing about it. There were many innocent lives lost families broken and no matter how much sorries and money the govt. compensates nothing changes – that day every Indian changed every Indian got hurt lost something and the sad thing is nothing is done about any of this...

The government has failed to answer us and that hurts the most the elections were up and not once do I remember someone spoke about it; everyone behaved as if it never happened come on let’s get real guys. It was my 1st time for voting I didn’t feel like going and voting luckily my name wasn’t up but I m glad I wasn’t allowed I wouldn’t have changed anything anyways. It is said to want the change you have to change yourself first and it is right we got angry we had our marches our candle lits but that was that nothing came of that the only thing came out of it was a resignation by our CM and yea that changes everything – we were angry heck we still our but nothing is been done and nothing will be. I am not blaming a single person – a single party – a single CM it is high time we realize this simple logic we as a country have failed.

Is our city/country safer now – hell I don’t feel so I feel it is more screwed up than ever before and this time I m not scared of a terrorist coming and blowing something now even the so called politicians are at it destroying the country state by state we have a problem with our own fellow Indians. Let’s face it way things are going I don’t see why a Bombay yea Bombay come kill me sir!!! Won’t be a separate country I mean they have a problem with everything at the time when the country is wounded at its worst when these so called leaders should be uniting the country they are dividing it and destroying it at the grass root levels. I believe and I may be wrong but I get a feeling that we Indians are the biggest racists/statist south has a problem with north, east with west and vice versa everyone wants their piece of the humble pie.

Is it true we really can’t live together...is there no way back? A year has passed and it has left more questions than the answers...

Here I Am !!!

Never actually thought would one day sit and get myself started with blogging though I have always loved reading, appreciating them. But I guess time was running out indeed so here I am starting something new would be doing such more feats this year starting many things afresh taking that extra effort in creating my own stuff my own way... things which are me which would have my stamp and said truly by me. So just getting started will share a previous note which would say a bit about me…

So it’s been two decades since I descended to earth... I have learnt a lot and made many mistakes in a way learnt from them more den from anything...u will meet many people many fake many real but the beauty is how you find the real among the fake…many will break your heart you will break some too…learn to smile more den you cry…capture life as much as you can; friends take many pictures; live in smallest of moments...look around and find hope all around you amongst all the hatred…there’s no guarantees with life…no second chances… the one person who you thought won’t let you down will and I m serious…fall in love coz there’s no better feeling then that nothing compares to it…try keeping in touch with most of your family and friends they are all you have got at the end of the day…don’t try giving excuses in life…don’t be so busy for your best of friends and for yourself…you will fight with your best friends all the time and maybe even fall in love with them take chances...flirt, live life...do let your emotions go from within yourself…don’t cry because time is flying by remember your are flying with it too…this day dies tonight it wont come back so have no regrets…don’t waste too much time being angry or upset…learn to forgive but don’t forget…life passes us by when we are still make grand plans for it…and remember the slower we move the faster we die !!!

Peace out !!!